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And I interpreted it as him judging me, wanting to 'fix' me, because he only actually liked me when I was happy, rather that loving the whole of me. I interpreted that as 'something wrong with me, my fault, that I was a failure because I needed to see a counsellor, and I wasn't getting better', and I resented it, because I felt my bf contributed to my issues by always knowing the 'best way' to do something, and always telling me what that was. Your gf may be getting some of the same messages. Of course, in the darkest times, he had trouble doing that i think, because he was so emotionally exhausted by my depression. Invite her too, but go even if she doesn't want to come. Go out, and spend time with happy people.

My boyfriend is always miserable


So over the last few months I have been trying really hard to just say what I mean, ask for what I want, and stop expecting my bf to guess it magically. How to deal with someone who is always miserable? Finally, a note on labelling. Oh, um, talk with her about it, as rationally as the pair of you can manage. Your gf may not want to do it - despite my bf telling me for a year or more that he thought I was happier when I exercised, and my counsellor saying it could be as effective as antidepressent meds, it wasn't until I thought of joining the gym 'myself' that I actually did it, and committed. Go out, and spend time with happy people. I feel better, feel more confident and competent when I do that, especially when he thanks me for it - and he gets an evening of being pampered, for a change! But I also didn't like being labelled as having depression. I interpreted that as 'something wrong with me, my fault, that I was a failure because I needed to see a counsellor, and I wasn't getting better', and I resented it, because I felt my bf contributed to my issues by always knowing the 'best way' to do something, and always telling me what that was. I went through phases with it - I didn't like people intimating that my problems weren't real - they sure as hell felt real to me. That made a huge difference to my self confidence - I felt better about the way I looked, better about myself, more in control lifting heavier and heavier weights was great for that! Invite her too, but go even if she doesn't want to come. And I interpreted it as him judging me, wanting to 'fix' me, because he only actually liked me when I was happy, rather that loving the whole of me. But moderate to vigorous, and often! Consider seeing a counsellor together - even the 'waiting list' effect can be powerful having decided to see a counsellor, you've acknoleged a problem, and you can benefit before you even see someone. Perhaps you'd like to hear what helped me? Of course, in the darkest times, he had trouble doing that i think, because he was so emotionally exhausted by my depression. He felt much as you do, I believe - like he had to help me, fix my problems for me. I started gardening, and growing from seed that's cheapest , and for monthes that was a surefire way for me to cheer myself up, put myself back in a happy mood Which goes right back to point 3. Anyway, I very much hope you can find something in this long and rambling post that helps you and your gf. Your gf may be getting some of the same messages. Alternately, rather than you asking for help, she may benefit from starting a project that's HERS. My symptoms and history are similar to hers, except I was never on prescription meds they got prescribed to me, but my Mum and bf said it would be a bad idea, and I trusted them more than the doc. When he changed his job, he got happier, and I got happier because he was, I think. With the help of my wonderful bf and a counsellor, I have got over it mostly.

My boyfriend is always miserable

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7 Signs You're Truly Unhappy in Your Relationship





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1 thoughts on “My boyfriend is always miserable”

Fenrijind

21.03.2018 at 10:12 pm
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I feel better, feel more confident and competent when I do that, especially when he thanks me for it - and he gets an evening of being pampered, for a change! Invite her too, but go even if she doesn't want to come.

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