The information was then compared to see how similar or different each pair was and to see whether people in longer relationships had more in common. Because similarity is associated with attraction, it makes sense that individuals in committed relationships tend to be alike in many ways. The question is whether people actually seek out complementary partners or if that just happens in the movies. Gentle touch, eye contact, a gentle sense of humor, and the right words all create an intimate atmosphere. Sometimes this is called assortative mating , although this term is more often used to describe the ways in which people with similar levels of educational attainment, financial means and physical appearance tend to pair up. It emerged that all pairings held similar life views even if they had only just met.
Men value competency and problem solving. In , psychologists Matthew Montoya and Robert Horton examined the combined results of these studies in what's called a meta-analysis. There is essentially no research evidence that differences in personality, interests, education, politics, upbringing, religion or other traits lead to greater attraction. Once you make the connection, you can begin to work out the issues. Women value intimacy and emotional connection. Ad Feedback "We're supportive of each other being happy, and if that means occasionally going out for a burger with him, then so be it. This one may come as a bit of a surprise — not all blondes go for blondes, brunettes for brunettes and redheads for redheads. The benefits of homogamy Whether people really find opposites more attractive has been the subject of many scientific studies. Blended couples have blended children, who need both cultures. We talked to the experts, and we found that, in short, the answer is both yes and no. The excitement and challenge of your relationship comes from your differences; the security and ease of your relationship comes from your similarities. Researchers have investigated what combination makes for better romantic partners — those who are similar, different, or opposite? Matthew D Johnson is chair and professor of psychology and director of the marriage and family studies laboratory at Binghamton University, State University of New York. Follow her on www. It emerged that all pairings held similar life views even if they had only just met. They maintain it takes different perception, ideation, cognition and communication skills to raise a baby versus hunting down a mammoth. Whatever the case, the differences can be bridged. Dating, Sex, and Marriage , people tend to be attracted to those who are similar — not opposite — to themselves. If one is a workaholic, the other might get resentful of being left alone too often. United States Everyone seems to agree that opposites attract. Finding someone different is awesome! Beyond that, there's evidence that small differences between spouses can become larger over time. Intimacy Breaks Barriers Intimacy is the art of making your partner feel understood and accepted. She says that this can be the case if lifestyle habits are the differing factors. None of this necessarily means that opposites don't attract. It's even been internalised by people who are on the hunt for a partner, with 86 per cent of those looking for love saying they're seeking someone with opposite traits. If both couples are career-oriented, they can share their work challenges and goals with each other to have a support system in place.
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